"Do I dare to make changes...
I must say writing this journal is my dare. I don't know what to write or what to say. I am afraid that my journal will bore you, as writing is not my talent. Anyway, I accept this challenge and I dare myself this time.
Thinking back over 2 years ago, the time when I thought that working for a NGO was my field and I knew everything. I knew how to deal with or talk to an unfortunate child. I could help them at my best. However, I didn't have high self-esteem or value myself highly. I worked for 8 hours a day, always showed up for work on time and did my best. I thought that I did a good job then, but it was there was room for improvement. Helping children was wonderful, but my soul was not really satisfied. I needed a place to pour out my energy and to fill my soul and spirit.
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| In the early days with young men at Hal's Home. |
In 2012, I had chance to attend the 10 years anniversary of GIBTK, and I was shocked at their profession and their enthusiasm. I wished to be a part of their team. And my wish came true, I became a staff member of GIBTK. Being a new member of GIBTK, I didn't know where to start first. At this time, I was in charge of Hal's home - the home for male students and The Father's House- the home for mothers and babies.
Although I knew a bit about social work, it couldn't help me very much. Each NGO works differently, and this one was so new to me. I didn't know whether I could adapt and how long I could exist with this environment. As Robert stated if you wanted to seek for a clean job at GIBTK, then you should go. I wondered to myself what he meant and why he said that. At the same time, I received a lot of information and some surprised me. I was confused and totally overwhelmed. However, I didn't dare ask for a clear explanation.
Every day, I dragged my feet to the office, glanced at the clock and went home on time. I felt so lazy to get up and go to work. There were nothing interesting there! I was so bored and nearly quit.
Luckily, I haven't quit yet! One day, all of the confusion, all doubts, and all overwhelming thoughts were solved by my boss. My mind was kicked and I thought how crazy I was. I realized that I need to be more confident to speak up and dare to ask our boss about why this and why that. If you don't say, no one know, so be brave to speak up is a good way to solve your concerns. Furthermore, I understood why Robert said it would be not a clean job.
When working with kids, one needs an absolute servants heart to do the best for them. When we face any challenges, do not give up but try to find other ways to get over it. Thinking outside the box to help them and remember of GIBTK's mission statement to do right things.
Honestly since I started working at GIBTK, I have changed a lot. When I look back I am surprised at my changes. How could a person who once only read comic or novel stories change to reading leadership books? And she now has a great joy and feels interested in reading this kind of stuff? How could a person who didn't dare to speak up change to be vulnerable with others? How could a person who never felt confident in front of people change to do crazy things with no shame at all on stage in order to make children laugh?
To me, it has been amazing so far. What made I change? I dared to do it! I took risks to change! I changed as I knew it would be the good way to step up. I will not allow myself to stay in my comfort zone! Be courageous to step out of this comfort zone and do extraordinary things for kids. I am really curious about what will happen in my funeral. What will they talk or what will they remember about me? How do I live with the gap between the day I was born and they day I die? Will I leave a legacy for my life? That's what I strive for today.
Thanks for reading!"
Ngoc Anh
If you'd like to email Anh a word of encouragement I will be happy to forward it to her
